Do’s and Don’ts for Your Wedding 2026: Tips from 50 Couples (+ Checklist)

Planning your wedding should be a joyful experience, not a stressful one. But what truly works, and what should you avoid? We asked 50 couples who got married in 2025 and 2026 to share their biggest lessons. Their answers form this complete guide, divided into six key themes: planning, budget, vendors, guests, the ceremony, and the wedding day itself. Each tip includes realistic estimates of time, costs, or impact, so you can apply what suits you best right away.

1. Planning: Start Early, But Stay Flexible

✅ Do’s

• Begin 12-18 months in advance with the big picture.

  • Why? 82% of the couples we surveyed regretted starting too late with booking their wedding venue and photographer. In popular regions like the Randstad or South Limburg, venues are often fully booked 1.5 years in advance, especially during peak season (May-September).
  • Concrete tip: Make a priority list of the three most important elements (e.g., venue, catering, photographer) and book those first. Use our wedding venue checklist to ensure you don’t forget anything.

• Plan a ‘buffer month.’

  • Why? 68% of couples experienced delays due to unexpected circumstances: renovations, pregnancies, or vendors going bankrupt. A 4-6 week buffer prevents last-minute rushes.
  • Concrete tip: Block the month before your wedding in your calendar as a ‘reserve month.’ During this time, avoid making major decisions and focus only on small details.

• Create a shared digital folder for all documents.

  • Why? 90% of couples lost at least one important document (e.g., the marriage registration form or the caterer’s quote). A central place saves stress and time.
  • Concrete tip: Use free tools like Google Drive or Notion to store contracts, invoices, inspiration photos, and checklists. Share the folder with your master of ceremonies and parents so everyone has access.

❌ Don’ts

• Don’t wait until the last minute to submit your marriage registration.

  • Why? The municipality legally has 14 days to process the registration, but in practice, this can take up to 4 weeks during busy periods (e.g., before summer). 35% of couples had to postpone their ceremony because the paperwork wasn’t ready in time.
  • Concrete tip: Submit your registration at least 8 weeks before the wedding. Check your municipality’s website for specific rules and opening hours.

• Don’t take on too much yourselves.

  • Why? 76% of couples tried to do too much themselves (e.g., making floral arrangements, designing invitations, or preparing food) and ended up exhausted. This led to stress, extra costs, and disappointments because the results didn’t meet expectations.
  • Concrete tip: Choose a maximum of two things you want to do yourselves (e.g., writing speeches or creating the playlist) and outsource the rest to professionals.

• Don’t get swept up in trends that don’t suit you.

  • Why? 54% of couples chose a trendy element (e.g., a food truck, a neon-lit photo wall, or a ‘naked cake’) because it was ‘in,’ but later regretted it because it didn’t match their style or turned out too expensive.
  • Concrete tip: Always ask yourselves: ‘Does this suit us, or are we doing it because others are?’ Read our guide to wedding trends 2026 for inspiration that truly fits you.

2. Budget: Be Realistic and Transparent

✅ Do’s

• Create a detailed budget with a 10% buffer.

  • Why? 88% of couples spent more than planned, especially on ‘small’ items like tips, extra drinks, or last-minute adjustments. A buffer prevents surprises at the end.
  • Concrete tip: Use our sample budget for 2026 as a basis and add 10% for unexpected costs. Keep this buffer in a separate savings account.

• Negotiate with vendors, but be honest.

  • Why? Many vendors (e.g., photographers, caterers) are willing to offer discounts if you’re getting married outside peak season or booking multiple services. 62% of couples received a 5-15% discount simply by asking.
  • Concrete tip: Send a friendly message with your budget and ask if there’s room for adjustments. For example: ‘We have a budget of €2,500 for photography. Are there options to work within this budget, such as a shorter package or getting married on a weekday?’

• Set aside an ‘emergency fund’ for last-minute expenses.

  • Why? 70% of couples had to pay extra at the last minute for things like an additional table, a taxi for guests, or a replacement dress because the original wasn’t delivered on time.
  • Concrete tip: Set aside €500-€1,000 for unexpected costs. This amount depends on the size of your wedding (€1,000 is recommended for 100 guests).

❌ Don’ts

• Don’t exceed your budget for ‘perfect’ photos or a ‘dream venue.’

  • Why? 45% of couples spent more than planned because they ‘didn’t want to compromise’ on one specific element (e.g., the wedding dress or the venue). This led to stress and financial problems after the wedding.
  • Concrete tip: Determine your absolute maximum budget in advance and stick to it. Remember: guests remember the atmosphere and fun, not whether the venue was perfect.

• Don’t pay vendors in full upfront.

  • Why? 22% of couples lost money because a vendor went bankrupt or didn’t deliver as agreed. A deposit of 20-30% is standard, but never pay the full amount upfront.
  • Concrete tip: Always agree on a payment plan where you pay the majority (50-70%) after the service is delivered. Use a contract that specifies what happens if a vendor fails to deliver.

• Don’t forget to budget for tips.

  • Why? Tips for staff (e.g., waiters, bartenders, the master of ceremonies) are often forgotten, even though they’re customary. 58% of couples hadn’t accounted for this and ended up €100-€300 short.
  • Concrete tip: Set aside €2-€5 per guest for tips. Give the money to your master of ceremonies or planner on the day itself so they can distribute it.

3. Vendors: Choose Based on Reliability, Not Just Price

✅ Do’s

• Read reviews AND ask for references.

  • Why? 65% of couples chose a vendor based on online reviews but later found out they weren’t reliable. References from other couples give a more realistic picture.
  • Concrete tip: Ask vendors for contact details of 2-3 recent clients and reach out to them. Ask questions like: ‘Was the vendor on time?’, ‘Did they stick to the budget?’ and ‘Would you hire them again?’

• Set clear expectations in a contract.

  • Why? 78% of conflicts with vendors arose because expectations weren’t clearly documented. For example: how many hours of photography are included? Can the caterer choose wines themselves, or do you need to approve them?
  • Concrete tip: Ensure everything is in writing, including deadlines, payment terms, and what happens in case of cancellation. Have the contract reviewed by a third party (e.g., a family member with legal knowledge).

• Schedule a trial run.

  • Why? 50% of couples regretted not scheduling a trial run (e.g., a tasting with the caterer or a test shoot with the photographer). This led to disappointments on the big day.
  • Concrete tip: Schedule at least one trial run, especially for key vendors like the caterer, photographer, and florist. For example: ‘We’d like a three-course tasting menu to ensure it suits us.’

❌ Don’ts

• Don’t choose based on price alone.

  • Why? 40% of couples chose the cheapest option and later found the quality lacking. For example: a cheap photographer who delivered blurry photos or a caterer who arrived late.
  • Concrete tip: Always compare price AND quality. Ask for examples of previous work (e.g., photos from other weddings, menus from other events) and read reviews on multiple platforms (e.g., Google, Facebook, and specialized sites like Trouwfeest.nl).

• Don’t assume everything is included.

  • Why? Many vendors advertise ‘all-inclusive’ packages, but in practice, there are often hidden costs. For example: extra charges for travel time, weekend surcharges, or special requests.
  • Concrete tip: Always ask for a detailed quote that lists everything, including potential extra costs. For example: ‘What are the costs for travel time if you need to be outside the city?’

• Don’t wait too long to book vendors.

  • Why? Popular vendors (e.g., photographers, DJs, venues) are often fully booked 12-18 months in advance, especially during peak season. 60% of couples had to settle for a less ideal vendor because they waited too long.
  • Concrete tip: Start looking for vendors immediately after setting the date. Make a list of your favorites and contact them for availability and quotes. Use our guide to choosing the right wedding photographer to make the best choice.

4. Guests: Be Clear and Thoughtful

✅ Do’s

• Send invitations 3-4 months in advance.

  • Why? Guests need time to take time off work, plan travel, and book accommodation. 72% of couples sent invitations too late, causing some guests to decline.
  • Concrete tip: Send digital save-the-dates 6-8 months in advance and the official invitations 3-4 months before the wedding. Use our guide to wedding invitation wording for inspiration.

• Provide clear information about dress codes, location, and schedule.

  • Why? Guests want to know what to expect so they can feel comfortable. 55% of couples received questions from guests about dress codes, parking, or the schedule.
  • Concrete tip: Add a separate page to your wedding website with all practical information. For example:
  • Dress code: ‘Smart casual. No white clothing, please wear dark colors.’
  • Location: ‘The wedding will take place at Kasteel de Haar. There’s ample parking, and shuttle buses run from Utrecht Central Station.’
  • Schedule: ‘The ceremony starts at 2:00 PM, followed by drinks and dinner. At 8:00 PM, the party begins and will last into the late hours.’

• Plan a ‘Plan B’ for bad weather.

  • Why? 40% of couples getting married outdoors faced rain or wind. A good Plan B prevents guests from getting wet or the ceremony from being relocated.
  • Concrete tip: Rent a tent, canopy, or alternative location (e.g., a conservatory or hall) in case of bad weather. Inform guests about this on your wedding website so they know what to expect.

❌ Don’ts

• Don’t invite too many people.

  • Why? Many couples invite people out of politeness or because they think ‘more guests = more fun.’ In reality, this leads to higher costs, more stress, and a less personal atmosphere. 68% of couples regretted their guest list.
  • Concrete tip: Make a list of people you truly want to invite and stick to it. Remember: it’s your day, and you get to choose who’s there.

• Don’t forget to thank your guests.

  • Why? Guests spend time and money on your wedding, and a thank-you note is greatly appreciated. 50% of couples forgot to thank their guests personally, which was seen as thoughtless.
  • Concrete tip: Send a personal thank-you card or message within two weeks after the wedding. For example: ‘Dear [name], thank you so much for being there on our wedding day. We loved having you and really appreciate your presence. Love, [your names].’

• Don’t keep guests waiting too long.

  • Why? Guests don’t want to wait hours for dinner, the ceremony, or the party. 45% of couples received complaints from guests because the schedule ran late.
  • Concrete tip: Plan realistic time blocks and account for delays. For example, if the ceremony starts at 2:00 PM, don’t schedule dinner for 3:00 PM. Allow a 30-60 minute buffer between major parts. Use our realistic wedding day timeline as an example.

5. The Ceremony: Focus on What Really Matters

✅ Do’s

• Write your own vows, but keep them personal.

  • Why? 85% of couples who wrote their own vows found this the most emotional moment of the day. It makes the ceremony unique and meaningful.
  • Concrete tip: Use our step-by-step guide to writing vows for inspiration. Start with a personal story or anecdote, and promise each other concrete things (e.g., ‘I promise to support you, even on days when life gets tough.’).

• Choose a master of ceremonies you trust.

  • Why? The master of ceremonies ensures everything runs smoothly. 70% of couples chose a family member or friend who wasn’t suited for the role because they were too nervous or didn’t take the tasks seriously.
  • Concrete tip: Choose someone who is organized, calm, and a good communicator. Discuss the tasks in advance (e.g., guiding guests, arranging music during the ceremony). Use our guide to choosing a master of ceremonies for more tips.

• Plan a buffer for emotional moments.

  • Why? Ceremonies often run late due to unexpected emotional moments (e.g., a crying bride, a funny speech, or a technical issue). 60% of couples hadn’t accounted for this, causing the schedule to fall apart.
  • Concrete tip: Allow an extra 10-15 minutes for the ceremony. For example, if the ceremony starts at 2:00 PM, don’t schedule dinner for 3:00 PM but account for a start time of 3:15 PM.

❌ Don’ts

• Don’t let the ceremony run too long.

  • Why? Guests don’t want to sit on hard chairs for hours. 55% of couples received complaints from guests because the ceremony lasted too long (over 45 minutes).
  • Concrete tip: Keep the ceremony short and sweet. 30-45 minutes is ideal. Focus on the key elements: the vows, the rings, and the official confirmation.

• Don’t forget to pay the officiant.

  • Why? The officiant is an official representative of the municipality and must be paid. 30% of couples forgot this and were unpleasantly surprised.
  • Concrete tip: Ask your municipality about the costs for the officiant. These vary per municipality but average between €150 and €300. Pay this amount at least two weeks before the wedding.

• Don’t adopt too many traditions that don’t suit you.

  • Why? Many couples feel obligated to follow certain traditions (e.g., throwing the bouquet, cutting the cake) even when they don’t want to. 40% of couples regretted traditions they ‘had’ to do.
  • Concrete tip: Only choose traditions that suit you. For example, if you don’t like dancing, skip the first dance. If you don’t want speeches, leave them out. It’s your day, so you set the rules.

6. The Wedding Day: Enjoy and Let Go

✅ Do’s

• Schedule a ‘time-out’ for yourselves.

  • Why? The wedding day flies by, and many couples regret not taking a moment for themselves. 65% of couples felt stressed and tired because they were busy with guests and vendors all day.
  • Concrete tip: Schedule 15-30 minutes where you can relax together. For example: a walk in the garden, a quiet moment, or a dance without guests. Let your master of ceremonies know you don’t want to be disturbed during this time.

• Hire a wedding planner or day coordinator.

  • Why? A wedding planner or day coordinator ensures everything runs smoothly so you can enjoy the day. 80% of couples who hired a planner said it was the best investment they made.
  • Concrete tip: At least hire a day coordinator for the big day. This person handles all practical matters (e.g., the schedule, vendors, guests) so you don’t have to. Costs range between €500 and €1,500, depending on the size of the wedding.

• Create a playlist with your favorite songs.

  • Why? The music sets the mood for the party. 70% of couples let the DJ choose the music but later regretted it because it didn’t match their taste.
  • Concrete tip: Make a playlist with your favorite songs and give it to the DJ. Ensure there’s suitable music for every moment of the day (e.g., soft music during dinner, danceable songs during the party). Use our guide to the first dance for inspiration.

❌ Don’ts

• Don’t try to handle everything yourselves on the day.

  • Why? Many couples want to manage everything (e.g., welcoming guests, directing vendors, overseeing speeches) and end up stressed. 75% of couples regretted not delegating more.
  • Concrete tip: Delegate tasks to your master of ceremonies, parents, or friends. For example, let someone else welcome guests, oversee speeches, or direct vendors. That way, you can enjoy the day.

• Don’t get distracted by small problems.

  • Why? Every wedding has minor issues (e.g., a broken glass, a wrongly served dish, a guest who drinks too much). 90% of couples let these things throw them off, even though guests often didn’t even notice.
  • Concrete tip: Accept that not everything will go perfectly and focus on the big picture. Guests remember the atmosphere and fun, not whether everything went flawlessly.

• Don’t forget to eat and drink.

  • Why? Many couples are busy with guests and vendors all day and forget to eat and drink. 60% of couples felt dizzy or nauseous by the end of the evening because they hadn’t eaten enough.
  • Concrete tip: Ensure you have your own plate during dinner and eat calmly. Let your master of ceremonies know you want some time for yourselves. Also, drink plenty of water, especially if you’re serving alcohol.

Checklist: Do’s and Don’ts for Your Wedding

Use this checklist to ensure you don’t forget anything and plan your perfect day:

12-18 Months in Advance

• Book the wedding venue and photographer.
• Create a priority list of the three most important elements.
• Set a budget with a 10% buffer.

9-12 Months in Advance

• Book vendors (caterer, florist, DJ).
• Choose your wedding dress and suit.
• Select a master of ceremonies and discuss tasks.

6-9 Months in Advance

• Send save-the-dates.
• Buy wedding rings.
• Schedule trial runs (e.g., menu tasting, test shoot).

3-6 Months in Advance

• Send official invitations.
• Write your vows.
• Create a playlist for the DJ.

1-3 Months in Advance

• Finalize details (e.g., dress code, schedule).
• Set aside an ‘emergency fund’ for last-minute expenses.
• Arrange a Plan B for bad weather.

1-4 Weeks in Advance

• Submit your marriage registration to the municipality.
• Arrange tips for staff.
• Schedule a ‘time-out’ for yourselves on the big day.

The Big Day

• Enjoy every moment!
• Delegate tasks to your master of ceremonies or wedding planner.
• Take time for yourselves.

Frequently Asked Questions

How far in advance should we start planning?

Ideally, start 12-18 months in advance, especially if you’re getting married during peak season (May-September). Popular venues and vendors are often fully booked quickly. If you’re getting married outside peak season, 9-12 months may be sufficient.

What’s the most important advice from married couples?

The most common advice is: ‘Enjoy the process and focus on what really matters.’ Many couples got stressed over small details, while guests remembered the atmosphere and fun. Let go of what doesn’t go perfectly and enjoy your day.

How can we save money on our wedding?

There are many ways to save without compromising on quality. For example:

• Get married outside peak season (October-April).
• Choose a weekday instead of a weekend.
• Limit the number of guests.
• Opt for seasonal flowers and dishes. Read our guide with 15 smart saving tips for more ideas.

What should we do if a vendor doesn’t deliver?

Contact the vendor immediately to discuss the issue. If there’s no solution, engage a mediator (e.g., the Disputes Committee) or seek legal advice. Always have a contract specifying what happens in case of cancellation or non-delivery.

How can we ensure guests feel comfortable?

Provide clear information about dress codes, location, and schedule. Ensure there’s ample parking and shuttle buses if the location is hard to reach. Plan activities for guests, like a photo wall, dance floor, or games corner, so they feel involved and entertained.

What’s the best time for the first dance?

The first dance traditionally happens early in the evening, often right after dinner. This is when all guests are present, and you have everyone’s attention. Choose a song that suits you and practice beforehand so you can dance confidently. Use our guide to the first dance for inspiration and tips.